Yesterday, it was reported that Jesus appeared on some vines on a utility pole. Which is obviously true; look how cross-like that pole is! Wait, all utility poles are shaped like that? Well obviously Jesus chose to appear as a random blob of vines just there because it's cross-shaped.

Unfortunately, earlier today the Jesus-haters at the local administration office deemed the vines a safety hazard and ordered them removed. The Jesus vines died for our sins of bureaucracy.

Face of Jesus appears on a utility pole.

This has got to be one of the most distorted Jesus "faces" I've seen yet. If I was god, I'd be insulted that people thought I was so ugly and deformed. But the faithful are inspired!

For days, hundreds of the faithful have been coming to see what they say is the image of Jesus Christ on a utility pole in Alice, Texas....

However, the image has been vandalized. Someone took a magic marker to the pole and drew a mustache on the image. The act brought some believers to tears.

How do they know god didn't create the mustache too? All the pictures of Jesus have mustaches, so it was just an attempt to make the picture more accurate, obviously.